Sharpening the Ninja Sword

I think that I’m a pretty open minded person. I’m not quick to make assumptions about people and for the most part, I don’t judge anyone (unless we’re discussing fashion, then I tend to get a little judgey. Sorry, but I take fashion pretty seriously in the scheme of life. You have your “things”, this is mine).

People tend to tell me lots of things – things they haven’t shared with anyone else and don’t want to share with anyone else – because I’m trustworthy, I’m easy to talk to, I don’t judge and I can usually offer some pretty damn good advice (I seriously should have been a shrink). I like that about me. I like that people know they can come to me, that I am a safe place.

I suppose when this is who you are it’s shocking to know most people aren’t the same way. I can’t count the number of times someone posts something on Facebook about a situation they really don’t know anything about. Even better is reading all the comments that always follow with people making asshole remarks about something they know absolutely nothing about. It’s baffling. I read the comments and think, why the fuck do these people think they should have any opinion regarding this situation? Apparently people think that just because they know a snippet of someone’s life they should be able to determine the whole story.

I share some of my life on here. I’ve written about being in a tough place in my life right now. It’s hard for me to share anything outside of my punks because of the fact so many people are judgmental but writing is my outlet and I chose to start a blog so I guess that’s what I get, right? Some of you know my story. Others read my blog and make assumptions about what is going on. I’m fine with it for the most part, I’ve shared my story openly with the people who mean more to me than anyone, besides my punks. I’m blessed that I have surrounded myself with people who truly love and know me, keep my business their own and are my safe place.

Today I’m baffled how anyone can say they care about you, claim they are your friend and then assume they know your story and proceed to tell other people. I mean, I see it on Facebook but I’ve never experienced it first hand. When you truly care about someone you don’t discuss their private business with other people. You take the time to privately address it, if you even have any business doing that. Hell, I give that much to people I hardly know so I absolutely expect that from my friends.

I don’t strive for perfection I simply strive to be the best version of me I can be. It’s important to me to be a good friend. To love deeply, madly, freely. To be compassionate, keep an open mind, to be nonjudgmental. To accept that people have flaws (including my own, some of which are some of my favorite pieces of me). To listen when someone needs to talk, to offer advice when I can. To love the woman I’ve grown to be. To try my hardest to not assume I know anyone’s story. Because at the end of the day, we have no idea what is really going on in anyone’s life unless you’ve been told directly. It’s really that simple.

I don’t expect these things from everyone, but the people I choose to surround myself with need to have a basic understanding of what it means to be a friend.

To quote a friend, “It’s time to break out the ninja sword and delete.”

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