3 Kicks 2’s Ass.

I have great news! My baby punk is finally potty trained. I still have to help wipe his ass but at least I’m not changing diapers anymore which means the amount of poop on my hands has dramatically decreased as of late. Not only are we saving money on diapers, but our hand soap is lasting longer too.

It made me sad for about a minute. My little baby punk is growing up and I will never have a baby as young as he is rightthisminute ever again. Then he wrote all over himself with sharpies, called me a “jewk” and hit his brother and I wasn’t sad anymore because really, he exhausts me with this kind of shit. He really needs to pull it together and stop acting like he’s three years old or something.

He’s finally sleeping through the night, too. Now that I’ve made this statement public I’m sure he’ll be down for a 2am welfare check on me tonight, but I haven’t seen that kid in the middle of the night for a couple of glorious weeks. At first it was weird. I’d wake up and immediately think something was horribly wrong. It only took a couple of nights of uninterrupted sleep for me to start to enjoy it because I catch on pretty quickly. And for as much as I love that punk, seeing him every night at 2am isn’t my idea of quality time.

Three has, thus far, proven to be far more successful than two, although he hates for me to Vine him which is an utter disappointment because he is pretty weird and full of good stuff. I just hope he can get on board sooner, rather than later, because people are really missing out and that makes me sad. Plus, this is some good quality time in my book. I feel pretty confident that one day he’ll think I’m the coolest mom in the world for documenting his childhood.

A while back I started writing a book. Have you ever tried to study for a chemistry test with punks up your ass? Me either, because I never took chemistry, but I’m pretty sure it’s close to the same thing. Needless to say, it was put on hold because, seriously, I haven’t gone to the bathroom without an audience in about 7 years so what are the chances the punks will leave me alone to actually write? Slim to none, people.  However, in a couple of weeks I’m sending them all to school (ALL OF THEM – preschool counts even if it’s only two mornings a week) so I’ll have some time to dedicate to writing. Maybe I’ll even get back to blogging more than twice a year.

Honestly, I suppose my lack of posting comes from not wanting to put my life completely “out there” and when things are off track it’s easier for me to keep quiet than to share my life. For my birthday this year I got a tattoo on my wrist, “FEARLESS”, as a reminder to live my life fearlessly moving forward. I’m hoping this reminder will allow me to do more than share ridiculous stories about my punks and more of myself. To be okay with each place I am with my life and know that it isn’t right or wrong, it’s just where I am at that time. And to allow myself the gift of peace with each place in my life.

So here’s to the last couple of weeks of summer and deciding to live fearlessly. To finding peace, loving deeply and moving forward. Here’s to figuring out who you are, loving the person you find and celebrating every minute of your life – good and bad. Mostly, here’s to the people who love and accept you exactly as you are at every point in your life because they are the ones who hold us together when everything else falls apart.


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